A Grand Knight of the Order of the Toucan is one of those exceedingly rare writers who combine vast talent, massive wit and enormous intelligence with considerable experience of the world and a tendency to be extremely original, insightful and inspired at all times. They are philosophical, erudite, frequently contrarian, passionate, phlegmatic, astute, dreamy, utterly independent and totally authentic. They often have backgrounds in science or engineering (rather than the arts) and constantly overflow with brilliant ideas and wonderful conceits. They nearly always have a good physique and superb heads of hair and operate alone as heroic individuals rather than as members of a writing group or cartel.
Because of jealousy and petty resentment, Grand Knights of the Order of the Toucan are frequently unfairly targeted by inferior writers such as hacklings, and also by maturity wankers and clunk cliquers, all of whom resort to dirty tricks and tactical twatism.